Valuable – you mean me?

When I make a mistake and get criticized – or even just mentioned, I feel bad. Sometimes I catch myself saying: Oh man, am I stupid! Better would be: I have made a stupid mistake!

What’s the difference, you ask? One statement is: There’s something wrong with me and I’m bad. That’s about my value.The other statement is: I’ve done something that wasn’t good, which means my behavior wasn’t right.
If my behavior wasn’t right, then my value hasn’t changed. It remains the same, I’m always worthy! I can always stand tall, no matter how many mistakes I make or what my performance looks like today, even if I don’t accomplish anything! But I assume that I will correct my mistakes as best as I can. But even if I don’t do that, and even if that might have an impact on my life, my value is still the same.

On the other hand, I have the feeling that if I perform well, my value increases. But this is also a misconception! When I then say to myself: Wow, I am valuable! Then it is true – but that’s always true and applies at all times, and it applies to all other people as well.

We read in Wikipedia: According to modern understanding, human dignity is the value that is attributed to all people equally and regardless of their distinguishing characteristics such as ethnicity, gender, age or status; …

The value of a human being always remains the same and is also anchored in Swiss jurisprudence. It applies to all people and cannot be changed. 
If we look in the Bible it says, that God calls us his children if we believe in him. This also means that we are important and valuable to Him. Regardless of whether we do what he says or not! And regardless of that he loves us!

“Consider this: The Father has given us his love. He loves us so much that we are actually called God’s dear children. And that’s what we are…“
1. John 3:1 (GW)

He loves me even when I make mistakes and I am still his child. It probably grieves God when I do things that do not please Him, but His love is certain! It’s the same with us parents. If my children do something “stupid” or annoy me, then they are still my children, I still love them and they are valuable to me.

Then why do we feel so unloved, small and bad for every mistake? The awareness of being worthy and loved at all times is something we have all lost to some extent, but we can and should regain it!

It is helpful to say the following sentences aloud, to proclaim them, again and again, until you believe them yourself. Especially those that are difficult for you to proclaim. I’m sure you can think of many more things to say…

I’m valuable when I say “no.”
I’m valuable when I don’t perform.
I’m valuable when I don’t want to be intimate.
I’m valuable if I think differently.
I’m valuable when I don’t do what others expect me to do.
I’m valuable when I have needs.
I’m valuable when I make mistakes for the umpteenth time.
I’m valuable when others are angry at me.
I’m valuable when I’m assertive.
I’m valuable even when I’m angry at myself.
I’m just as valuable as the smartest, most beautiful, coolest person on the planet.

Next time you feel bad, remember that you are a wonderful person. Furthermore, there is nothing you can do, positive or negative, to make God love you more or less. His love for you always remains amazingly great!

It’s liberating, gives you courage and makes you more authentic when you are aware that your value is irrevocably given. Yes, you are valuable!